Penguins are just like us – having to resort to flying machines in order to get their heavy asses off the ground. Except they would probably have more success if they used technology that is less than a century old. If you’re an airplane nerd like myself, you’ll notice a wide variety of contraptions on this shirt, including Otto Lilienthal’s 1894 “wing-flapping” glider, the Ritchel Flying-Machine from 1878, and Orville Wright’s 1911 glider.
Product Page: ($18)
The “Safety Misinformation Toiletry Bag” takes a humorous look at airplane safety.  The following info is from the manufacturer’s website:
“This case’s mock safety card print has got all the fixings of something interesting – bright, unusual colors, cartoon-effect imagery, and unabashed silliness. Its symbols, such as the one telling me that I can indeed use my remote control car on the plane, and its nonsensical text, such as “Please stow all babies under your seat,” would, if real, make safety information cards side-splittingly engaging.”
Sure, it’s all fun and games until someone slaps a baby under their seat, suffocating it’s previous screams and fits of crying…I like where your head’s at “Safety Misinformation Toiletry Bag.”
If the airline is going to drop your plane into the ocean for a crash landing, the least they can do is to make your exit fun. The last thing you remember of that harrowing experience will be the fun ride under the clown rather than the near death experience it was.
Product Page ($18)
You have all heard of First Class, Business Class and Coach Class when flying. This bag offers a fourth option – Fetish Class. The bag lays out pretty clearly exactly what that means. It will also save the security people the trouble of x-raying it.
Product Page ($12.31)
Say hello to the world’s first $2 billion kite. Not only is it made and coated in radar absorbent materials and able to bomb 16 targets in a single pass with 2,000lb bombs, but it will really impress your friends and look super cool at the end of a string.
Product Page: ($25.54)
Here we thought playing with paper airplanes was a nice, safe activity. It is now apparent that even paper can cause a sucking chest wound. Learning by experience is not always the optimal way to be taught.
Product Page ($17.99 CAN or about $14.60)
