If your significant other puts on “a show” after a few drinks at a party, you may want to pick up one of these shirts and legally absolve yourself from any involvement. The full text on the shirt is available after the break.
Full Text: “DISCLAIMER I am in no way responsible for the behavior of my date. He or she is an adult person over whose actions I have no control. By inviting us/allowing us to attend your party or event, you agree to indemnify and hold me harmless from any and all social, legal or other consequences resulting from any and all episodes or incidents involving my date, including (but not limited to): food or drink spillage; excessive hors dâ€™oeuvre consumption; boring, awkward, inane or arrogant conversation; inappropriate or offensive statements or jokes; arguments; random exclamations (coherent or otherwise); flirting, leering, lechery, girlfriend/boyfriend stealing; air guitaring; loud singing (on or off key); hugging, pinching, goosing or other improper or unwanted touching; flashing, mooning, stripping or other nudity or sexual behavior; table dancing; TV channel switching; abrupt changes in musical selections; practical jokes; emotional meltdown; kleptomania; wrestling/catfighting; bad breath, belching, farting or vomiting; inaccurate urination; light switch raves; chandelier swinging or other random physical stunts; bathroom hogging; party game cheating; spontaneous body piercing; video gaming; use of your phone, computer or internet; copy machine abuse. I am thus hereby released from any social anxiety or embarassment whatsoever, and shall remain to you a personage of good standing and respect.”
Product Page ($15)