Castoos are graphics applied to your cast that tell the world exactly what kind of fracture you’re dealing with. You can choose from generic broken bones, or they can be customized by sending a digital file of your x-ray. They will also serve as a visual disclaimer against doing stupid shit, and depending on the severity of your injury, they can also be the tipping point between mocking laughter and sympathy from friends.
injury
You might think that just coming down to Earth is the end of your trials as a skydiver, but this shirt is happy to remind you that bad chance can hit anyone at any time. Just as an example, there could be millions of natives boiling a pot of water in the wilderness at any given time.
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Here we thought playing with paper airplanes was a nice, safe activity. It is now apparent that even paper can cause a sucking chest wound. Learning by experience is not always the optimal way to be taught.
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The Accident Prawn is a typical example of the crustacean family. They are known for their tastiness and not their agility. So to see one on crutches is not that unusual. Or at least wouldn’t be if they had underwater hospitals to treat them. Maybe if you wear this shirt you will make people aware of their plight.
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A head wound can say a lot about how it was caused. You can’t call yourself a student of medieval times without a thorough knowledge of each. You should be able to pick out how any deceased person of the olden days died of simply by consulting this handy shirt.
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If you have ever wondered why fights break out at soccer matches or why people wait in anticipation for cars to crash in NASCAR races, I give you the Bernard Pollard Fan Club t-shirt. If you don’t already know, Bernard Pollard is the Kansas City Chiefs safety responsible for tearing Tom Brady’s MCL and ACL last Sunday—taking him out for the season.
Sports make us evil folks. EVIL!
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