Uh-huh, nothing says non-conformist, anti-establishment punk like stuffing Fido into a camo mohawk hoodie with a little skull and crossbones emblem to add that extra touch of personality. I’d say it would be much cooler to dispense with the hoodie, break out the hair gel and take advantage of the fur styling possibilities. How about little Snowball walking down the street sporting a neckhawk, bellyhawk or tailhawk?
Product Page: ($36)
You would normally think that having a fake pet as a piece of jewelry would save you from the whole doggie clean up that is required. While this ring does include the poop you should be cleaning, it just wouldn’t be the same if you bagged up those droppings.
Product Page ($8)
I am not typically one to pass judgment, but this little get up is beyond anything I could imagine someone wearing. Leather and blindfolds are kinky enough, but wearing a mask in the shape of a dog’s head is taking things a step further than I am personally comfortable with. Someone must have an interest though, and I would love to see what kind of person that is.
Product Page ($49.99 starting bid)
If you’re going to carry a dog everywhere, why not bring one that actually does something for you other than bark and offer the constant threat of ruining your clothes with it’s doggie droppings? This polyester pug purse has all the cuteness of a real dog, except this one opens up to hold all of your stuff.  It features a crystal paw, dog bone collar, poseable legs, and dragonfly silk lining in the purse. You’ll look great carelessly throwing this dog into the back seat of your new Jag, and you’ll be able to piss off Peta members wherever you go. Good times.
Product Page: ($44 – 49)
No dog has a body meant for a bracelet more than the dachshund. That long body can wrap all the way around your wrist for a tight hold. Just try wearing a pug bracelet. The best that could do is to sit on top of your wrist and fall off with any movement at all.
Product Page ($69.95)
I have never seen two more worried animals than this. Both of them are shaking like a leaf. This just seems like cruel and unusual punishment. They would probably be happy to go back to their makeup testing days. A little lipstick may burn, but at least there was no thought involved.
Product Page ($14.95)
Let your shirt give your teacher all the evidence you need to prove that your dog really did eat your homework. If the teacher doesn’t appreciate that your dog had to be irradiated just so you could avoid a zero for a grade, then they have no heart at all.
Product Page ($15)
This bag is like an intelligence test for potential dates. It is non-sexist, both men and women can use it. There are a handful of scientists that anyone with a decent education know about, and Pavlov may be the most famous of all. Your dog may even know about him if only from legends passed down from his parents.
Product Page ($14.99)
