You don’t need to save the world to join S.H.I.E.L.D., you can just put on this costume t-shirt. It even comes with an Agent Coulson ID badge on the pocket so no one will have to guess about who you are!
Though really, if all you want to do is put on a t-shirt, I don’t think you have what it takes to get past the admission test. Put in a tiny bit of effort and hit the thrift shop for a suit shirt, tie, and jacket. You’ll get points for initiative.
Product Page ($19.99)