From the category archives:
Sure, you can get a tie with a picture of the Mona Lisa printed on it. But that is not nearly as much fun as completing the masterpiece yourself. You have to figure that with it being set up as a paint by numbers picture you could get almost the same results yourself. Or you can just wear the tie and let others paint it while you wear it. You have to love a product with so many options available.
Product Page ($45)
Is this ice-cream tie tacky? Yes—and it’s dangerous too. You may find yourself under attack by children and out-of-control food addicts.
Product Page ($19.88)
This Cut Throat tie from Cybertropix says a lot about your mental state and your feelings about your job. Lookin’ sharp!
Product Page ($30-$50 via Uncrate)
Ukiyo5 brings you this 100% silk tie that features Atomica, a Manga inhabitant of the Miyuko Mansion as a ninja. She is described as someone who exposes herself to dangers and likes visually aggressive and provoking stuff, so wearing her on your tie will no doubt solidify your image as a rebel, and make every day in your cubicle a non-stop thrill ride.
Product Page ($42)
Hopefully your boss seeing you wear this tie doesn’t remind him of how much time you spend barely moving at work. I’m not sure how the tie has anything to do with business unless you’re a mortician, but the colors are pretty.
Product Page ($12)
Synth nerds finally have a tie that reflects their personal style. According to the product site:
Built in 1975, the EMS Synthi-E was one of the first traveling synthesizers, strangely foreshadowing the laptop music of today. It was a low cost version of the Synthi-A designed for schools and colleges, the unit was easily transportable as it is housed in a small briefcase and is battery operated.
The tie itself is made from a soft microfiber and the colors can be altered upon request.
Product Page ($30)
What’s going to be your secret weapon when you go in for that big interview…wood, baby. How could a big executive pass up a potential employee who’s wearing a neck full of Utah Alder? In addition to that, how could a woman reject you when they know you have $730 to spend on a strip of Manzanita Root? There are plenty of reasons to pick up a wooden tie, and the best one comes from the product page itself: “They’re just cool looking if you ask me!” With a well researched, impartial statement like that, how could you possibly go wrong?
You know you’ve been thoroughly desensitized to the business of death when you start to turn it into a lifestyle. Such is the case with these hearse cufflinks, tie bar, and stick pin. Described as having a “fun, bubbly vibe” and being “a great gift for anyone in the funeral biz”, they’re perfect for turning yourself into the used car salesman of the mortician circuit. You can use them as a conversation starter during those dull embalming procedures, or to lighten the mood next time you deal with a grieving family. All three are hand painted and offer a 3D retro 60’s style hearse design. Additional photos are available after the break.
If you didn’t get that big raise you were shooting for, or if everyday at work is like spending a day in hell, you can protest with this delightful “I Hate Work” tie. It will let all your bosses, co-workers, and clients know exactly where you stand, even during those momentary lapses where you actually crack a smile on the job.
Speaking of laughs, you will get a few at your co-workers expense as they stare dumbfounded at the pattern (the tie must be turned horizontally to be read properly). You can even mix things up during the week with the “I hate ties” tie, the “pull here to end misery’ tie, or the “I hate my job” tie. On the other hand, you have the option to be a total ass kisser with the “I love my boss” tie—all of which are pictured after the break.
Product Page ($29.95)
Don’t want to sound pompous about that special job or talent you have? Let these ties do all the bragging for you. They’ll say more about your lot in life than words ever could. Wearing them will boldly tell the world that you are a dedicated member of the Audio/Visual club at school, that you usher with pride at the local Cineplex, that you are a skilled artisan in the area of grandpa humor, or that you like magic. Any way you look at it, they all equal one thing…chicks, and lots of them.
The necktie/bowtie combo are both made from real film. The necktie measures approximately 13” and has a convenient brass weight at the bottom to hold it down. It also features photos of a large city with sailboats, palm trees, ocean liners, etc. The bowtie sports scenes of San Francisco complete with trolley. These badges of cool are available on ebay until October 30.
Product Page ($14.00)
