
Until they develop a “douchebag detector” that will allow people to get soaked if they like shoving old ladies while walking down the street, the many sets of lips on this nylon umbrella appear closed for your convenience in order to keep the rain from pummeling you and ruining your finery.
Product Page: ($260)

This umbrella is your usual drab colored umbrella when it is in its normal state. But once it gets wet the clouds and raindrops will shine with their multiple colors. A simple way to brighten up a dreary day. Once the rain stops and the umbrella dries it is back to its black and white state.
Product Page ($32.77)

Unfortunately, there is an M&M genocide going on as we speak. Sweet, delicious genocide.
Product Page ($20)

Imagine the headline: “Man unknowingly walks into traffic while trying to read his umbrella“. Now that you know about the potential embarrassment, don’t let it happen to you.
Product Page: ($19.95)

Be ready for both a rain storm or a chip shot to the green with this umbrella. The golf club handle and iron head will be useful any time you find a golf ball waiting to be hit. They say it is not to be used to hit actual balls, but who could resist trying it at least once?
Product Page ($65)

You remembered to bring your umbrella, so there is no reason you should have to share that comfort. This umbrella should help with that. Nobody is going to want to stick their head under a bunch of spiderwebs. Except for you, of course.
Product Page ($24.65 AUD, about $18.27)

This unique pirate umbrella illustrates just how rough a life of swashbuckling and sailing can be on anyone—especially children. This kid is like 8 years old and he already has a missing eye and right hand.
Product Page ($15)

It’s pretty hard to find anyone who actually enjoys a rainy day. We always need a little rain, but it doesn’t have to go on for days at a time. This umbrella is just saying out loud what everyone is thinking.
Product Page ($45 Canadian, about $35.30)