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Since burgers are cheap, easy, and readily available on most street corners from fast food pimps, there’s not yet a call for hardcore beef and patty porn. Not to mention the fact that the Food Network is giving it away for free.
Product Page: ($24.99)
Hit the bank, or the slopes wearing one of these stylish ski masks. Go as a hamburger, werewolf, clown or Jesus. Maybe you and your crew can mix and match—although it’s more difficult for a teller to take you seriously when the bank is being robbed by a burger and Jesus. It might also lead to some unwanted nicknames in the local press. I can picture it now: “The Jesusburger Gang strikes again!”
Here are the top ten Fashionably Geek Products for the week of January 11th-17th, 2010:
Party Fowl: Big Bird is a party fowl.
WoW Epic Apron: Boosts your cooking speed.
Mazeltov Cocktail: It’s a Rabbi riot.
Skeleton Jeans: Now THESE are skinny jeans!
Android Robot Plush Bag: Prepare for an invasion of little green men.
Although hamburgers are delicious, you have to wonder about their marketability as a fashion statement. It’s not a good sign when you can’t even get the models in your ad to actually wear the product your selling. the dude’s muffs look especially superimposed. You can almost hear him saying: “I’ll hold the burger and smile, but there’s no way in hell I’m wearing those things”.
Product Page: ($10.75 via Random Good Stuff)
A few burgers and large sodas and even previously feared Japanese monsters will put on a few pounds. The pudgy faced dinosaur with a gut doesn’t instill fear in too many people any more, unless they are behind him in line looking for a burger and some fries.
Product Page ($10)
Forget bagging grass clippings, you just need to hire yourself a different breed of mower. Get yourself a few cows and you can feed them at the same time you get your lawn mowed. Plus, fattening them up can only lead to good things.
Product Page ($17.99)
Here are the top ten Fashionably Geek Products for the week of July 13th-19th, 2009:
Race Advantage T-Shirt: Lance Armstrong could use this race advantage.
Steel SAP Gloves: Are better than brass knuckles.
Spin Cycle T-Shirt: Should kitty be dried on ‘delicates’?
Hamburger Helper T-Shirt: You must really like Hamburger Helper.
Bling Soap On a Rope: Keep your rep at all times.
It’s time to redefine cool and sophisticated with designs like this. The next time a tuxedo-clad millionaire steps out of his Mercedes for valet parking, he should produce a cheeseburger from his pocket to provide that large tip. Same goes for the next Bond movie; when Q briefs 007, he should receive a cheeseburger wallet packed with the latest spy gadgets that is later used in an action sequence to save his life. This would be much more convincing than conventional leather. Am I alone?
Product Page: ($25)
Here are the top ten Fashionably Geek Products for the week of June 8th-14th, 2009:
I Heart Pubes Tote Bag: There’s just something about those curls!
Super Mario 3 Necklace: Keeps the cartridge close to your heart.
H1-N1 T-Shirt: A toilet may be R2-D2’s unfortunate offspring.
Baron VonFunburger’s Haunted Castle Cavalcade T-Shirt: Enter if you dare.
Dog Meets Batman T-Shirt: What happens when a nerd and a dog are teleported together?
